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The struggle is real. There are places in my body that hold the deep subconscious resistance to what I am trying to do here.

My body aches for all the things of the future and all the things from my past. It is juicy and really fucking painful. The life I desire to have and the magic I desire to Be are more painful to birth than Bobbi. The past weighs heavily on my body as my soul is cracking open.

As I reach for the channels that expose my truths, I can feel the heat of the known. Somehow the pain of the unknown is bone-breakingly cold, and I really hate the winter. I also know that once I get there, to the unknown, the magic will build me the life and fire that will truly set me free. I will be free and wonderfully wild.

The reality that I play with is just beyond my embrace. My fingers drip with the nectar of this game. So far I can only get handfuls of the magic.

The transformation is coming.

The Universe has been listening.

My body is anxiously, painfully waiting.

It will all be realized in Divine timing.

How did I get so lucky as to be between these two worlds, able to have pieces of me touching both?

The moment I surrender will be the moment of my evolution. Universe, show me more of what is to come. I promise I'll give in.

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