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She Curse

There is a theme that has been blowing up in my world.  It is loud.  It is uncomfortable. It is not just me. Why don't women play? Other than flirting during the initial romance? Other than with a really good bottle of wine? I see how kids are drawn to men. Men are so willing to engage playfully. I hear us women say that all the kids love him and I'm chopped liver. We are good for snuggles but never silliness. And silliness comes from a different piece of your soul. I feel so deeply the grief in our souls and our bodies, in the collective of women.  When did we lose our playfulness? Was it beaten out of us? Was it corrected? Was it not popular or proper or pretty? Stop playing with that! Sit still! Don't touch that! Was that scary?! This narrative changes girls. We teach our girls to stop playing and start doing whatever it is we are told to do.

It is so different for boys. Go outside and play! Here, play with this while we wait! Did you touch it?! Was it so fun?! This narrative is deep within my lineage. I don't remember the women playing. I am guilty of it now too. Where did this curse begin? How does playing with children, or anyone for that matter, become a chore? Puberty? Safety? Motherhood? Responsibility? Church? Modesty? Popularity? Abuse? Somewhere women and play gets separated, deprogrammed, overridden, and shamed. Men can be goofy, silly, loud... PLAYFUL, until they are old and grey. And women sit closely by, with what looks like quiet adoration, and what feels like a hole in their soul because we want to be drawn in, to feel so free, and we want to WANT TO play. And we don't know how, we can't remember, we feel stupid, we are rigid, embarrassed, tired. It just does not live within us anywhere. Not that we can see. What does it take to reprogram play? What does it take for loud laughter and octopus arms to be the norm? What does it take for play to grow? Play Fun REAL deep belly laughter that makes you want to do that thing for hours and hours. If your entire Being feels this, like mine, this journey might be for you too. Come and play with me. Let's learn to play, together! Curiosity Exclusives

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